Today was just a typical day, a whirlwind of diaper changes, feeding, cleaning up, nursing, refereeing, cooking, more diaper changes, more cleaning, cuddling, and disciplining until we finally got everyone to bed around 9:30 (which actually isn't a typical bedtime, we were out late for a birthday party). With some Chinese thrown in there too.

Sometimes I go an entire day with just a glance in the mirror in the morning and by the end of the day I'm shocked at how I look, an untamed ponytail and smeared mascara on the bags under my eyes. Its not that way on purpose,  I don't intend to loose myself by the end of the day. But it happens. Its just a season I know.

I need to reconnect with myself today, I need to remind myself that its me still in there. Behind that tired mascara, underneath the shirt with spit up on the shoulder, that I, Kacie, exist. Not just as a mother, or a wife, or an expat trailing spouse, but simply me.



So here are 10 things about me today, to remind myself that I'm still here.

1) My muscles are sore from a work out I got in yesterday. My legs HURT, but they feel good because I know I chose to do something healthy for myself, to take care of me.

2) I drank 3 Coke's today. I'm starting my sugar detox tomorrow. Well maybe Monday, but definitely by next week. Or maybe in June?

3) I'm finally listening to the Serial Podcast. I'm addicted, its a fascinating story! I miss listening to the radio and radio dramas! It reminds me of growing up overseas while my parents were missionaries with a radio broadcast organization and hearing my dad on the radio in the mornings.

4) Today a friend and I were discussing our future repatriations, moving back to our homes, and decorating ideas. I really enjoy decorating and creating a pretty space for my family and a welcoming place for my friends. I felt excited about the prospect of having my own place to decorate, but apprehensive since I don't know where that will be next.

5) I collect globes. I love decorating with them, they remind me that I'm a global citizen and have called many places in the world home.

6) My baby is becoming really smiley and starting to laugh. He's so much easier to make laugh than the girls were at this age. I'm so thankful for this kid who is so happy to see me all the time. What a little joy bringer!

7) I use essential oils and just found out I have a new little product on its way to me, a diffuser necklace. One more thing to look forward to when I get to America in a few weeks!

8) Lately, at the end of the day, I've been fighting claustrophobia. I'm not sure if that's the right term, but I start to feel a strong sense of cabin fever. Even if I've had a chance to get out of the house like today, in the evenings I feel an overwhelming sense of being stuck inside.

9) We're going to America for a visit in a few weeks!!! I'm starting to feel EXCITED!!!!!! But also dread, because its really just a short trip and I'll have to return. Although I want to come back here, I also don't want to leave there.

10) I went to what we call the "fake" market yesterday, a place that sells all kinds of goods including knock-offs of everything, from Beats Headphones to designer hand bags. I bartered in Chinese and got pretty good deals and felt incredibly proud of myself. This time last year I had barely visited the fake market, and now I was there by myself, haggling in another language. What a difference a year makes!



What is something about yourself that you are proud of today?